Peace Begins with You and Me

Welcome to a new chapter in the story of our country, a chapter starting with possibility and hope, as well as unrest. As we watch and wonder how long it will take for our country’s division to be resolved, we can turn our attention from the television, phone, iPad, and other devices, and look inside of ourselves right now.

As part of my new year commitment to myself, I have been taking extra time every day to ingest spiritual teachings that resonate with me. One such reading is from the book Discourses, by Meher Baba, whose place of final rest I was privileged to visit one year ago. In the chapter called, “The New Humanity”, Baba explains that wars and conflict stem from the human tendencies of competition, conflict, and rivalry; and by the time there is a large war or division, these tendencies have long had their way in the hearts and minds of individuals. Wars, Baba states, are just the out-picturing of these states of mind and behavior. Elimination of these tendencies is what will resolve all need for war.

In reflecting on this reading and my Unity-raised background, over 2,000 times in my life singing “Let There Be Peace on Earth” (I calculated that number!), I took inventory of where I might be perpetuating competition, conflict, and rivalry. It didn’t take much looking! There are so many avenues of expressing these little human traits: Age, politics, values, beliefs, and even food choices! I’m sure my list would be unending.

Are you willing to take that inventory? I invite you to look at the ways you compete with others, even if in your own head! Do you feel superior or inferior to someone else? The popular catch-phrase in recent years could be included in this inventory: FOMO: Fear of Missing Out. Are you afraid someone will get something (an experience, a thing, an attention of some kind) that you might miss out on? That’s competition and rivalry, too!

Once being aware of these divisive tendencies, our challenge is to weed them out of our internal common practice. We could ask ourselves:

If  wasn’t looking at this [person, situation] through the lens of “them versus me”, how would I approach it differently?

Can I see that “they” hold their views as tightly and righteously as I hold mine?

Can I have compassion for human opinion because it has ever been thus?

Can I see that the only person I can truly change is myself?

What constructive action can I take with my human opinion, instead of using it to separate “me” from “them”? (Volunteer? Vote? Teach? Forgive? Release my own fears? YES!)

“Be not afraid”. If you look this phrase up on the internet, you will find it in hundreds of passages in the Bible (and many other wise, spiritual teachings), always offering us assurance that everything will work out for good. Jesus, a Divine Spokesperson in human form, encouraged listeners to have faith and be strong—don’t let your fear swallow you whole!

Don’t let fear or anger swallow you whole.

Remember and hold consciously, there is a Divine Plan to wake us all up—even “them”! Join with me in seeing that without conflict, we can’t see what needs to be healed. We are seeing it. Now we can help heal it, beginning with “us”—you and me.

Peace begins now.

Photo by Lynn Barrette, 2020. Meherabad, Ahmednagar, Maharashtra, India. 51st Celebration of Meher Baba’s Mahasamadi. OM.

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Maintaining Clarity during Turmoil

We are experiencing a unique time. We all have a great need to connect and support each other, even when physical connection is necessarily limited right now. I offer you what I am practicing myself, and sharing with others in my work.

The pandemic is a global issue that is affecting EVERYONE on the planet right now; and we are all in shock. Whether we are aware of it or not, we are in shock. Whenever we experience something that we don’t know how to fully wrap our minds around, our brain/body system goes into a state of shock of self-protection until we can fully grasp what is happening or has happened to us.

Fear is contagious; so is PEACE. Everything we do right now to support ourselves in maintaining our own calm is supporting humanity. Taking care of ourselves is the best way to help everyone.

How has the pandemic affected you so far? Have you noticed any of these:

• Fewer distractions
• Left to our own thoughts
• More intense relationship time
• Less positive validation from others
• Easy to forget our impact
• Depletion of positive activities
• Decreased human touch / Hugs
• Touching on old issues/trauma

What positive outcome can you see coming from this time?

• Re-evaluate priorities – What is really important to you?
• Let go of bad habits
• Reinforce positive changes
• Commit to being good to yourself

Remember your basic self-care right now:

• Maintain healthy hygiene
• Maintain good nutrition
• Do those little things that help you feel extra good about yourself
• Keep moving! Go for walks as available
• Get outside, get sun
• Take advantage of YouTube: Yoga, exercise videos, variety of movement
• Laughter and play are essential!
• Connect with others via telephone, FaceTime, Skype, etc
• Be productive – Get those home projects done!

And, be extra aware of what is happening on the INSIDE of you during this time. How you are feeling and coping with our current reality will likely change every day!

• Have compassion for yourself right now.
• None—NONE–of us know what we’re doing!
• Write down your thoughts and feelings about what is happening and how it is affecting you
• How are you different because of this? How might you be different?
• Look for positive possibilities within the upheaval
• Embrace the moment / BE HERE NOW more than ever
• Listen to your inner voice and follow that inner prompting

Here is a simple guide to be aware of your inner process:

1. Know Yourself
2. STOP. STOP!
3. Proceed from your calm state

Know Yourself: In order to manage your own emotion, you must first be aware of what emotions are arising in you. Pay attention to yourself, your feelings, your thoughts, your body tension. How does feeling stressed or affected by the pandemic show up for you? Other questions to help you be aware of yourself include:

• How are you dealing with what is happening? Serious? Flippant? Afraid? Superhero? Numb?
• What in your life has changed already because of this?
• What might possibly change in the near or distant future?
• What do you need during this time to care for yourself?
• Be aware—you might not know the answers to any of these yet!
• Have alone time if you’re at home with others — Be with YOU!

Stop. STOP. STOP! : Regaining clarity to your body means moving from a state of dysregulation (agitation) to regulation (calm). Your mind-body system will follow your focus. Step away from the thoughts.

• Go for a walk and pay attention to the nature that you see.
• Notice that birds are still singing, clouds are still blowing by, grass is still growing green, flowers are emerging
• Get up and clean something – you know, THAT closet… Be productive!
• Quiet mind, quiet body / Quiet body, quiet mind
• Meditation

Proceed from Your Calm State: When your mind-body system is calm, your thinking is clear, “Proceeding” can mean:

• Take an action – Reach out, rest, write your thoughts, be productive,
• Let go of believing that there is something you can control
• Be there for someone else – Get out of yourself
• Did I mention, “Let go”?
• Flow with the current reality

Your best support of yourself, your loved ones, your community, your global family right now is cooperating with the public safety measures and taking the best care of yourself that you can, with love, compassion, and supporting your own peace daily.

With much love,

Lynn

Resources from video:

Spiritual Thermometer

HeartMath Quick Breath

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What We All Need to Do about Trump

I’ve been a mental health therapist and spiritual counselor for almost 12 years, and I haven’t seen anything like I did starting in November 2016. My field called it “Trump Anxiety Syndrome”, and it started the night he was elected President of the United States.

I have listened to friends, family members, clients, and strangers all expressing fear about what was happening in our country. I have felt it myself. Most days, actually.

As a person who has been trained at depth to look at the bigger picture, I started asking myself, “What do we need to do to heal this fracture that has become US?”

This is a problem for all of us—not one of us is left out of this gaping wound.

The common denominator—and I don’t care what “side” you are on—is that Trump is a predator, a perpetrator; and you are either on the victim side of that, or the enabling side of that. And your choice is based on emotions from your past.

As I listened to all of these people in my life, their thoughts, opinions, emotions, the common thread was that Trump is triggering for each of us all of the times we have ever been on the receiving end of a perpetration of any size. He’s a bully, a violent asshole. Who hasn’t experienced either of those in some shape or form?

Power. Safety. Survival. These are the buttons he pushes in you, no matter what, no matter who you care to vote for in any election.

If you are afraid of him, look into your history and see where you have ever been a victim of bullying behavior, by a parent, classmate, authority figure, or peer of any kind.

He punches you right in that tender, unprocessed place in your body where all that hurt is stored. He reminds you of nearly everything you hate about the darkness of which humans are capable.

If you are sympathetic with him to any extent whatsoever, the same is true for you. He gives you safety from a false sense of threat. He lies and says that you aren’t safe unless you believe his every word and back him up. It’s better to side with the bully than to be the victim, isn’t it?

And he’s right. If you don’t buy into what he’s doing, he’ll throw you aside like he does with all of his nay-sayers.

Just like a bully does.

Just like an abuser does.

Just like a predator does.

Ok, take a deep, belly breath.

What can we do?

Not only does he remind us of our violated places in our own history, he is actively perpetrating against humanity on a regular basis. How can we do anything about that?

Forgive.

What??

Forgive. And forgive like crazy.

Forgive all of those past hurts of all the bullies you have ever encountered because that emotion is coloring your ability to proceed clearly, calmly, wisely.

If you identify with either of the following statements, this work belongs to you:

“I’ve been hurt and I want to hurt you back, so I will attack the bully.” (As tempting as this is, it’s not healing or solution-oriented.)

Or:

“I’ve been hurt and taken from, and I’m scared for my safety, so I’m siding with the bully because he’ll keep me safe.”

You can mix and match those and they still fit, don’t they?

Forgive, because while he is still perpetrating, your past hurt makes you lash out in more hurt and anger, and fuels the bully and all of his cohorts.

There is no winning, no healing, no moving forward with past hurt as the powerful fuel feeding today’s fire. We are being shown in full color how being run by emotions ends badly. For everyone.

Forgive because we need your voice! Clear, strong, unrelenting, rational, persistent.

And when you engage in emotional force that results in insults, more hurt, division, separation, you are fueling the perpetrator. You are giving him fodder for his damaging behavior, fodder for his fear-based rhetoric that is Pablum for his supporters.

And if you do support him, or are even mildly sympathetic, forgive. Forgive those you fear. Fear always lies. Forgive those you are afraid will take something that belongs to you. Forgive those who you are are afraid will hurt you. Forgive those you feel misunderstand you. Only then will you see clearly what is real.

Hopefully you also reflect on why you are so fearful; but if all you do is forgive those you feel threaten your safety, you will help us all be a step ahead of where we are now.

It may not seem like much, but nothing will change without each of us taking this step.

The only way we will make it through this is to clear our own past hurts and threats and fears and anger. Then we can see how to stand, how to communicate, how to embrace, how to heal, how to evolve.

Please. Forgive. Today and tomorrow and the next day. Whatever it takes. Heal and rise above the hurt so that you can be part of a greater America. A greater World.